On the day of the father’s funeral, my husband was having affair

1

Upon learning of her father’s death, Hazel was watering the plants on the balcony. The call came from a neighbor, who explained that in the morning, due to heavy fog, her father went out to buy groceries and accidentally fell into a sewage well on his way back. When he was rescued, he had already stopped breathing.

For a moment, Hazel’s mind went blank. She could hardly believe her ears, feeling as if everything was unreal, as if in a dream. The neighbor’s voice lingered in her ears, offering condolences and advising her to mourn and handle her father’s affairs promptly. Hazel took a deep breath, thanked the neighbor, and hung up. Only then did she realize tears were streaming down her face without her awareness.

It was a silent cry. True sorrow was never about wailing loudly because the strength for such weeping was gone.

Hazel didn’t understand why such a thing would happen to her. Her mother had passed away less than three months ago, and now her father had left as well. The two most important people in her life were no longer there to be seen.

Her mother had passed away due to illness. For the last half year, Hazel had been by her side. During those days, her mother endured sleepless nights due to pain, keeping quiet to avoid worrying her. Watching this, Hazel felt unbearably distressed. Her mother’s departure, she had mentally prepared for. But her father’s sudden departure, without leaving a single word, caught her off guard.

After handling her mother’s affairs, Hazel had planned to have her father come to Beijing with her. However, her father insisted on staying in their hometown, accustomed to it and wanting to visit her mother’s grave frequently. Hazel had no choice but to ask the neighbor to take care of him and call her if anything happened.

Little did she imagine that the first call from the neighbor would bring the news of her father’s death.

2

Hazel rushed back to handle her father’s affairs. She was in a daze, but thankfully, with the support of relatives and friends, things went relatively smoothly. Her husband, Julian, had an important project and couldn’t accompany her to her hometown. He could only offer words of comfort over the phone, advising her not to be too saddened and to take care of herself. He also transferred some money to her.

Returning to Beijing, Hazel remained in a fog. The simultaneous loss of her mother and father had a profound impact on her, making it impossible for her to continue a normal life. She sank into depression, frequently shedding tears, feeling the impulse to jump when standing by the window, and often having trouble sleeping at night. There were a few instances when she couldn’t resist cutting her arms.

In such a state, she couldn’t take care of her daughter, Ruby. Fortunately, Julian’s mother understood her situation and continued to stay to help. Julian’s mother managed the household meticulously every day, advising Hazel not to be too heartbroken, to look forward, and to pull herself together for the sake of her child. Julian’s mother also mentioned that her father must have loved her mother so much, not willing to leave her alone in the netherworld, so he joined her.

At that time, Julian’s mother often seemed hesitant to speak, and later Hazel realized she might have known something. However, consumed by grief, Hazel didn’t think much about it and couldn’t discern any underlying meaning in Julian’s mother’s words.

Until one day, someone added Hazel on WeChat and sent her a photo. The picture showed an intimate couple, Julian and a woman Hazel knew, Julian’s subordinate named Aria. Aria, the one who sent the photo, arrogantly said, “Julian doesn’t love you anymore. You shouldn’t hold onto your position. Get a divorce quickly!”

Hazel didn’t respond to her. Aria persisted, describing the closeness between her and Julian, claiming there was no sequence in relationships, and those not loved were the third party. She said Hazel had thick skin and lacked self-awareness.

Hazel decided to block her. However, before doing so, she saved that photo.

3

Hazel confronted Julian with the photo in hand. He pleaded desperately, claiming it was a momentary lapse of judgment. He professed that Hazel was the only person he truly loved, and his involvement with Aria was nothing more than a fleeting affair. He begged Hazel to give him a chance, promising to cut ties with Aria and return to the family for a better life.

Julian’s mother also urged Hazel, emphasizing that Ruby was still young and hoping Hazel would forgive Julian this time. She warned that if he dared to repeat his mistake, she would definitely break his legs.

However, Hazel couldn’t find it in her heart to forgive. She had been with him since she was eighteen, just starting her freshman year. She devoted her best years to him, defying her parents’ objections to stay with him when they had little money, often surviving on simple meals. During those financially challenging times, she never complained, willingly enduring hardships with him.

They worked hard, and at the age of thirty-one, they finally bought a small house and settled down, later welcoming Ruby. By then, Hazel’s mother’s health had deteriorated, preventing her from helping with the child. Julian’s parents were also occupied with various matters, making it impossible for them to stay in Beijing permanently. Hazel had to resign from her job, focusing on the family while occasionally taking on freelance work online.

Meanwhile, Julian’s career soared as he caught a favorable wind, earning a salary close to a million yuan annually, with additional income from projects. Their relationship was good, and Julian contributed most of his earnings to Hazel. He took care of the family and, whenever he had free time, spent it with Hazel and Ruby, creating a harmonious and pleasant life.

Everything changed when Hazel went back to her hometown to care for her ailing mother, and Julian’s mother helped look after Ruby. It was during this time that Julian became involved with Aria. What disgusted Hazel the most was that on the day of her father’s funeral, Julian was still entangled with Aria in an affair, indulging in pleasure while she was in deep sorrow. The irony of the situation was overwhelming.

With these thoughts in mind, Hazel couldn’t find closure. She couldn’t cross this hurdle without divorce, as she couldn’t swallow the bitterness of staying in the marriage.

4

With Hazel’s insistence, Julian had no choice but to agree to the divorce. Out of guilt, he gave Hazel the house, the car, and custody of Ruby, taking only a portion of their savings. He provided a generous monthly alimony for Ruby.

Shortly after the divorce, Julian married Aria. Perhaps for the sake of convenience in seeing Ruby, he bought a new house right next to Hazel’s neighborhood.

Every time Hazel thought of Julian’s betrayal, she couldn’t help but harbor intense resentment, but life had to go on. For Ruby’s sake, she couldn’t continue grieving and had to gather the strength to face each day. Fortunately, Ruby had started kindergarten, requiring only morning and evening pickups. Hazel found a new job, dressed neatly every day, and spent her evenings with Ruby. Although Ruby was young, she was a considerate little companion, often displaying heartwarming gestures that made Hazel feel that post-divorce life wasn’t so bad.

As life returned to normal, more than three years passed, and Ruby started elementary school. Julian visited Ruby a few times each month, bringing snacks and toys, showing a gentle and affectionate side while spending time with her.

Hazel couldn’t recall the exact day, but Julian’s expression became somewhat lonely, his face a bit worn, no longer exuding the confidence he once had. There were now white strands in his hair, and his shoes weren’t as clean. Hazel, watching this transformation, felt an inexplicable sadness and couldn’t summon hatred anymore. After all, he was the man she had once deeply loved, leaving an indelible mark in her life. She remembered him in white attire, the image of a spirited youth. Time indeed wielded a ruthless knife.

Hazel never intentionally inquired about how Julian and Aria were faring after their marriage; it had become irrelevant to her. She only knew that they hadn’t had children, but the reasons behind it remained unknown.

Hazel didn’t seek another partner. With Julian’s timely and generous alimony, even though her salary wasn’t high, she and Ruby led a comfortable life.

5

In the autumn of Ruby’s second grade, she contracted mycoplasma pneumonia. Julian’s mother, fearing it might affect Hazel’s work, voluntarily came from their hometown and stayed for over a month.

Hazel and Julian’s mother had always gotten along well. Julian’s mother was a reasonable person who never made things difficult for Hazel. During that month, Julian’s mother frequently complained about Aria, stating that she wasn’t someone capable of managing a household. She spent money recklessly, avoided all household chores, and created chaos in her relationship with Julian.

Julian’s mother expressed her preference for Hazel, praising her for being polite and capable. She blamed Julian for not cherishing what they had, leading to the disruption of their once happy home. Hazel didn’t know how to respond and could only offer a smile.

With Julian’s mother’s careful care, Ruby recovered well, and Hazel was grateful for her help. Soon, Julian’s mother told Hazel that Julian had divorced Aria, initiated by him, and gave her a sum of money. She also mentioned that a woman like Aria should have been kicked out long ago.

Hazel still didn’t know how to respond. She had once harbored hatred towards Aria, but in such matters, it takes two to tango. If Julian had behaved properly, there wouldn’t have been any issues with Aria.

After the divorce, Julian often visited Hazel. It was Ruby who requested his presence because he was much better at helping with homework than Hazel. He was patient, explained things thoroughly, and made learning enjoyable for Ruby.

Julian also spoiled Ruby, fulfilling her every request. On weekends, he frequently took Ruby to extracurricular classes, waited for her outside, and then they would eat together before going to a mall or park.

Naturally, the connection between Hazel and Julian increased. From initially exchanging simple greetings, they gradually engaged in longer conversations. Sometimes, they even took Ruby out together, each holding one of Ruby’s hands, resembling a family of three.

During the Chinese New Year, Julian went back to his hometown and planned to take Ruby with him. Ruby wanted both her mom and dad to be there, so she pleaded with Hazel to accompany them. Unable to let Ruby down, Hazel agreed.

Relatives in their hometown still referred to Hazel as Julian’s wife, and Hazel didn’t dispute it. Before the divorce, she had also come back with Julian, and it seemed like nothing had changed.

6

After the New Year’s Eve dinner, Julian went to play mahjong with some old friends, and Julian’s father took Ruby to play with the neighbor’s child. Julian’s mother engaged Hazel in conversation.

As they chatted, Julian’s mother suddenly said, “Hazel, why don’t you consider remarrying Julian? Look, today both his dad and I are here, and Ruby is so happy. Although Julian is divorced, he will surely remarry. If he finds another woman and has more children, won’t there be complications in dividing the property with Ruby in the future? Both his dad and I like you. Julian finding someone else is not as good as finding you! We don’t favor males over females; having Ruby as a granddaughter is wonderful. What do you think? Give it some serious thought. I can see that Julian also has this idea but is too embarrassed to say it.”

Hazel was momentarily at a loss for words, but fortunately, Ruby ran in and pulled her outside to set off fireworks. The blossoming flowers in the night sky were beautiful, but Hazel had no interest in watching; her mind was occupied by Julian’s mother’s words.

To say that Hazel had never considered remarrying would be untrue. In the lonely years after the divorce, she desired companionship, someone who understands her. Julian wasn’t a bad person, and she knew him well. Moreover, he was Ruby’s biological father, which gave her a sense of security.

That night, as Hazel and Ruby lay down to sleep, Hazel asked Ruby if she wanted Mom and Dad to live together again. Ruby, initially drowsy, suddenly perked up, nodding her head vigorously and bombarding Hazel with excited questions to confirm if it was true.

Ripples of conflict and reluctance surged through Hazel’s heart. She was torn and unwilling. In the years since the divorce, she had maintained her integrity, while Julian had experienced another marriage. It was challenging for her to accept him, especially when she remembered the times of her deepest sorrow, and he was reveling with another woman. It was like a thorn embedded in her heart. Yet, Julian’s mother’s words made sense, and Hazel also yearned for companionship. The decision was truly difficult for her to make.

7

Hazel had a sleepless night. During lunch the next day, Julian’s mother asked Ruby if she wanted to be with Mom and Dad every day, to which Ruby expressed a strong desire. Julian’s mother then inquired if Julian had thoughts of remarrying, and he affirmed. Turning to Hazel, Julian’s mother asked about her thoughts.

Seeing Ruby’s hopeful eyes, Hazel nodded slowly. She knew that, even if she was unwilling and couldn’t let go, remarriage was the best choice for her.

Julian was no longer the indispensable person he once was in her life. After a few turns, he understood his own value and wouldn’t beg her as he did when he made mistakes. If he wished, he could still marry a younger woman and have children. Remarrying wasn’t a necessity for him. Perhaps he was willing to remarry because he found it troublesome and considered Hazel a decent woman, also Ruby’s biological mother, suitable enough to make do with.

However, Hazel hoped he would humble himself, plead with her, so she could have some closure. Yet, the reality was that Julian couldn’t possibly meet her expectations. He wouldn’t stay single for long, and there were plenty of women eager to fill the gap. He wouldn’t reject other women for her. As Julian’s mother mentioned, if he had a child with another woman, Ruby’s interests would undoubtedly be affected.

This was reality. As long as a man had a decent income and a house, even after divorce and aging, he would still be sought after in the dating market.

But what about Hazel herself? If she sought an unmarried man, there was a high chance she’d have to have another child. If she chose a divorced man, he likely had children of his own, introducing more complexities. Moreover, with Julian as a reference point, she wouldn’t find most men appealing. Considering Ruby was a girl, living with a man without a blood relationship made her somewhat uneasy.

So, either she remarried Julian or she raised Ruby on her own. Her salary wasn’t high, and her job wasn’t stable. If she hesitated further, other women might seize the opportunity, and she would regret it.

She couldn’t help but think, “If only I had known it would come to this, I might as well have stayed married.”